Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Sword of the White Knight in Script Format






The White Knight Screenplay Attempt

By: Virginia Lori JenningsCollege Exercise


FADE IN:
INT.GREAT HALL- WESTINGTON CASTLE- DAY
In the center of the Great Hall four tables are organized end to end forming a square in the center of the hall. There are 20 knights sitting around the outside of the table. Most of the men are in their upper 30’s and seasoned warriors. They are all dressed in partial armor having just come from a battle field. The King, a man in his late fifties with a graying beard, sits midway down one of the tables.
Indistinct arguing…
INT. Castle Armory
The Prince, a boy in his late teens is seen wearing a black suit that is worn over the top of his everyday clothes. We find him hopping up and down as he hurries out of a Knights uniform that has been dyed black and stows the clothes out of sight in the corner of the Armory behind a beat up looking shield.
The arguing in the Great Hall can be heard through the walls.
The Prince hurries out of the room and throws open the door to the Great Hall. The King has his back to the door and does not notice the prince come in.
KING
She is a vigilante and must be stopped!
A knight on the left hand side of the table looks up at the prince and taps the side of his face urgently with two fingers.
PRINCE
Is the White Lady causing a scene again father?
The Prince stops suddenly as he noticed the knight that was trying to get his attention. He hurriedly snatches off his mask and hides it in his sleeve.
The King turns around just as the Prince succeeds in hiding his mask.
KING
How would you know son? I have ordered you to stay away from the battle field- It is not safe, have you been sneaking out again?
The Prince walks over and takes a seat at the end of the same table the king is sitting at.
PRINCE
Father, you are the one who wanted me to take some responsibility in this kingdom…
The King stands up furious.
PRINCE
But no I have not been sneaking out.
The Knights exchanged looks as the king sat down again.
KING
Good, now that is settled- The next time the White Lady shows up, capture her and bring her in.
PRINCE
She’s not harming us father, why do we need to capture her- she does fight for our side.
KING
Yes but she is a loose cannon, she has not announced her loyalty and just shows up at every battle to help? I don’t trust her- I want her brought in for questioning.
Knights (in unison)
Yes Sir!
EXT. FAR OUTPOST, AFTERNOON
A group of knights are riding up to the top of a hill that overlooks the country’s farthest outpost that has been surrounded by enemy troops. They assemble at the top before preparing to engage the enemy. The prince, wearing all black and disguised with his black mask, rides up from the rear of the group and comes to a stop and the head of the .
KNIGHT #1
Sir, do you really think it is wise to be fooling your father into thinking that you are not out here on the battle field?
BLACK KNIGHT
I’ve made my decision and it will do you good not to question it!
The Black Knight turns to look the field over. A figure in white has appeared along the edge of the forest below sitting on a white horse.
BLACK KNIGHT
There is the White Lady- Leave her to me!
The Knights all dismount and run down the hill to charge at the waiting enemy and the Black Knight veers off to the right- heading toward the White Lady.
As he approaches the White Lady, the Black Knight yells to her as they battle the enemy soldiers all around them
BLACK KNIGHT
The King has asked us to bring you in!
WHITE LADY
Is that so?
BLACK KNIGHT
I was hoping we may be able to convince you to come in on your own.
WHITE LADY
I don’t think so.
BLACK KNIGHT
How about I challenge you for it?
WHITE LADY
You can try.
BLACK KNIGHT
OK, if I kill someone with the least amount of blows than you, you must promise to come with us back to the castle.
WHITE LADY
I don’t know- I’m pretty efficient, what if you don’t beat me…
BLACK KNIGHT
Well then you go free till next time.
WHITE LADY
Deal! (pause) Oh, and if I come with you I will also need to bring my servant with me.
White Lady turns her back to the black knight and they watch each other’s backs as they fight. As they each defeat a foe they yell out their total needed blows to each other as if in a competition.
BLACK KNIGHT
Hey! I got that one in eight strikes!
The White Lady laughs.
WHITE KNIGHT
Just got that one in six!
BLACK KNIGHT
Bet you can’t beat that! Five!
WHITE KNIGHT
Can too! Four!
BLACK KNIGHT
Got that one in three! Watch your back!
The White Lady with her back to the Black Knight, does not turn in time and an enemy soldier grabs the White Lady’s hood and draws his sword to the front of the White Lady’s neck. The Black Knight rushes forward and kills the soldier just in time. However an enemy arrow hits the White Lady in the shoulder.
As the Soldier falls behind the White Knight he pulls with him the White Lady’s hood revealing the long hair of a girl that has been pulled back into a ponytail. The White Lady stumbles over the fallen soldier and the Black Knight reaches out to catch her as she falls unconscious.
FADE TO BLACK
INT. BACK AT CASTLE, IN A BEDROOM
Moonlight filters into a small room onto a bed where the White Lady lays sleeping still masked. Suddenly she sits bolt upright to reveal that her shoulder has been bandaged. She reaches around for a nightgown and finds one folded for her on the bottom of the bed.
She creeps slowly over to the door and opens it slowly. She spots three shadows disappearing around the corner of the hall. The White Lady then takes off her mask and hides it in her sleeve. Looking around she spots a wardrobe and finds a plain skirt and shirt inside and puts them on. Now no longer the White Lady, she creeps out of the room and into the dark hallway.
There is very little sound in the dark castle as the SHE tiptoes down the hall. Turning down the hall she saw the shadow go down she backs against the wall, a few doors down she notices that two double doors midway down the hall stand open ajar into a bedroom.
A shuffling sound and a whisper…
SHE pushes open the door and finds two men dressed in long cloaks trying to assassinate the king. Assassin 1 stands by the window and raises his sword when he sees her. The other Assassin stands by the king’s bed holding the king who is unconscious up in the air by his throat.
ASSASSIN #1
Kill the girl!
SHE grabs a decorative sword off of the mantle along the wall and as she lunges toward the man holding the king. Assassin 2 drops the king and turns to battle her. SHE kills him and then rushes toward Assassin 2 who jumps on the bed to get away from her.
KING
WH… what’s going on?
She ignores the king and continues attacking the Assassin as they circle around the room, suddenly as they near the window he jumps out of it. She runs over to look out the window and sees the Assassin escaping out the open gates on horseback.
The Prince and two of the knights come running in the King’s bedroom and see her standing by the window with a bloody sword.
PRINCE
Who are you! What are you doing in here?!
KING
Son this girl just saved my life.
ANGELA (AKA WHITE LADY)
Your Majesty my name is Angela, White Lady is my master, she asked me to stay here and protect you.
The King slowly stands up and away from the dead man on the floor.
KING
This man just tried to kill me! Who is he?
The Prince pulls back the Assassins hood to reveal one of the knights.
ANGELA
Your majesty if I may explain, the White Lady has been keeping an eye on your enemy for many months. She discovered a plot to infiltrate your knights about a month ago…
PRINCE
Fredric, George, Niche and Rolf showed up around that time…
KING
Angela where is the White Lady?
ANGELA
She thought she heard something suspicious and went to figure out what it was… no doubt she is chasing down the remaining attackers now.
KING
Son give us a minute, and get this thing out of here.
The Prince looked at Angela and then motions for the knight that came in with him to drag the corpse out of the room. They shut the door behind them as they leave.
KING
You killed that man and saved me all by yourself. Did the White Lady teach you?
ANGELA
Yes your Majesty.
KING
Would you mind teaching my son?
ANGELA
If I may your majesty, won’t the prince be miffed that you are ordering him to be taught by a girl?
KING
I think a little humility would do him good.
INT. CASTLE HALLWAY INTO THE GREAT HALL- THE NEXT DAY
Angela walks down the hall toward the Great Hall carrying a few different swords in her arms.
As Angela approaches the door she can hear sounds of metal scraping on metal and fast footsteps. She opens the door to reveal the prince dueling with 5 Paiges. Angela walks across the back of the hall and spreads the swords out on a table covered with a linen cloth. She touches a sword lightly.
CUT TO: FLASHBACK OF A LITTLE GIRL BEING INSTRUCTED BY HER FATHER HOW TO DUEL WITH A SWORD.
As she turns back again she stops midway down the length of the room to watch the duel. The Paiges are trying hard to battle the prince but still act afraid to beat him. Angela tries to hold back her laughter. She sees the prince lunge at a Paige with a move that the Paige could have easily blocked. Instead of blocking, the Paige drops his sword, and Angela busts out laughing.
PRINCE
(Defiantly) Who laughs?!
The whole room goes still and as all eyes turn to Angela, she covers her mouth with her hand to stifle her grin and bows her head. The prince walks over to her and standing barely a foot away from her he glares down at her.
PRINCE (CONT'D)
(Even more defiantly) What exactly do you find so funny! Speak now or I will have you thrown in the dungeon for your impudence!
Angela looks straight up into the Prince's face.
ANGELA
Your highness, it is just that if you wish to improve your technique than you would be better off practicing with someone who would challenge you- not those who are afraid of the consequences of beating you.
The prince steps back- shocked and angry.
PRINCE
Ho! So you think you can do better, can you! I can not allow such mockery to go unpunished; I challenge you to a duel then- lets see if you laugh after losing just as they did!
The Prince snatches a sword from the nearest Paige and tosses it to Angela.
(FLASHBACK TO FATHER TOSSING LITTLE GIRL A SWORD TO PRACTICE WITH)
As Angela catches the sword by its hilt easily, the Prince's mean grin disappears as he sets his jaw. Both Angela and the Prince face off.
The prince motions to Angela to take the first move but when she refuses he charges her with his sword held high. The Paiges back up as the two battle around the room.
PRINCE (CONT'D)
You hold a sword too easily for a servant; perhaps it is dangerous to have a servant in the castle who is so experienced with weapons.
ANGELA
And you need more experience! Your grip is too weak- dangerous for one who is supposed to defend his country.
Angela parries and sends the prince's sword flying from his hand and hilt deep into a table they had knocked over in their duel.
Red in the face, the prince runs to retrieve his sword but when he can't pull the sword from the table, Angela comes over and pulls it out herself. She holds both the swords by the hilt and the prince at sword point with a slight smile. The prince glares at her.
PRINCE
(Angrily) You are out of line! Leave my sight this instant or be flogged for your arrogance!
Angela's smile fades into embarrassment. She turns both of the swords hilts first to offer them to the prince. With an infuriated glare, the prince takes the swords from her. Angela curtsies quickly and rushes out of the room.
EXT. CASTLE GARDENS- LATER THAT EVENING
Angela stands in the middle of the castle garden with a pole. She swings it back and forth pretending to fight an invisible enemy. The Prince enters the garden and stands there quietly watching her closely.
Suddenly she notices him and stops practicing. With her eyes downcast she gives a respectful curtsy.
PRINCE
Don’t stop on my account… If I did not know any better I would say that your fighting style is not LIKE the White Lady but you fight as if you actually are the White Lady.
He walks in one full circle around her looking her up and down.
PRINCE
Listen (pause) I should apologize for my actions, I’ve just been really stressed lately with my father forcing the responsibility of the kingdom into my hands- I could really use a friend.
Angela smiles.
ANGELA
I would be honored your majesty.
The prince walks over and picks up a spare pole and turns to challenge her.
PRINCE
Oh, and please- If we are to be friends don’t call me “Majesty”, my name is Darius.
EXT. CASTLE COURTYARD
Out in the courtyard Angela is surprised to find the Black Knight along with the rest of the knights mounting their horses. She runs over to him.
ANGELA
(Alarmed) Where are you going?!
BLACK KNIGHT
We have no choice, we’ve been ordered to infiltrate the enemy camp and force them to surrender.
ANGELA
You could get captured or worse!
Angela blushes and bows her head in embarrassment.
BLACK KNIGHT
Miss. Angela your mentor would understand! It is our duty to follow the king’s orders.
Angela bites her lip and then looks up brightly as she comes up with an idea.
ANGELA
It is the White Lady who sends me! She asks that you wait. She does not want you to go she… She…
The Black Knight jumps off of his horse and places his hands on Angela’s shoulders.
BLACK KNIGHT
(Desperately) Listen Angela, I have to go- the prince is rumored to have been captured and is being held hostage…
Angela’s eyes widen in fear.
ANGELA
What! No! He only left to go hunting about a week ago! I told him it was reckless to go alone!
Angela turns away as tears fill her eyes. The Black Knight jumps down from his horse and turns Angela around to see her face.
BLACK KNIGHT
You must care about him a lot,
Embarrassed, Angela wipes her face and turns her head away from the Black Knight’s gaze.
BLACK KNIGHT
Listen, when I see him I’ll be sure and tell him that he should listen to you more if that will make you feel better.(pause) and (pause) If I don’t come back, tell the White Lady… Tell her I care about her will you?
Angela looks up into his eyes and blushes redder.
ANGELA
(Weakly)I will.
EXT. ENEMY'S CAMP
The White Lady rides alone toward the Enemy’s Camp in the cover of the night. She sneaks quietly into the center of the Enemy camp to free the knights who have all been tied to poles in the center of the camp. Before she can free the Knights, the Enemy soldiers surround her. The Leader steps forward.
ENEMY LEADER
At last, we have all of the Knights as hostages.
CUT TO: FLASHBACK OF YOUNG GIRL SLICING LEADER’S FACE WITH A SHORT SWORD. END WITH A CLOSEUP OF LEADER’S FACE TO SHOW THE SCAR.
The White Lady stares in shock.
WHITE LADY
I know you! You are the man that killed my parents!
ENEMY LEADER
Who are you?
The White Lady pulls down her hood and takes off her mask.
ENEMY LEADER
(Enraged) YOU!
WHITE LADY
Yes! I am Angela, the little girl that once gave you that hideous scar! And I’m about to make you a deal!
ENEMY LEADER
(Incredulously) Really! Now what would you have that I would want?! You have been a thorn in my side since the day I killed your parents. You’ve burned my camps, run off with my men’s horses, and disrupted most of my tactics! And stopped my plan to assassinate the King and his Son! Why the only thing you could possibly offer me that I would accept would be your life!!!
ANGELA
Exactly.
BLACK KNIGHT
(Desperately) No! Don’t do it!!
The White Lady chanced a lingering glance at the Black Knight and then turned back to the Leader.
ENEMY LEADER
(Greedily) I’m listening…
ANGELA
I propose a duel- If I win, you will promise never to attack this kingdom again AND you will set all of us free! IF I lose then the Knights go free but I will be at your mercy.
ENEMY LEADER
DONE!
With that said he charges at her with his sword held high. The White Lady barely has time to draw her sword and block his blows in time.
ENEMY LEADER
You know- with you out of the way when you loose. What is to keep me from just killing all the knights right after you?!
ANGELA
(Grimly) I guess just your honor as a gentleman.
They battle back and forth and as the fight gets more intense, the Enemy Soldiers widen their ring to give the two more room to fight.
ENEMY LEADER
What makes you think that you an orphan girl can defeat me! Why you couldn’t even save the person you care about the most before being caught!
ANGELA
The prince! (worried pause) Where is he!
ENEMY LEADER
HA HA! Well this is a surprise! Perhaps I have underestimated you!
Angela swings around and catches the Enemy Leader off guard; she knocks his sword out of his hand and holds him at sword point.
ANGELA
You also underestimate a woman’s ability to fight for peace and freedom for her home and country! Now honor your word!
The Enemy Leader waves his hand and his Soldiers free the knights. Angela holds the Enemy Leader at sword point until she is certain the knights have safely cleared the ring of soldiers. She bows to the Leader and as she turns her back to walk off. As she clears the ring of soldiers the leader grabs another sword runs and lunges at Angela. She turns quickly and runs her sword right through his chest.
ANGELA
Don’t underestimate me!
FADE TO BLACK
EXT. BACK AT CASTLE IN GARDEN
Angela sits quietly in the castle garden overlooking a pond. The Prince walks up quietly behind her.
ANGELA
So I guess the rumors that you were kidnapped and being held hostage were just some big joke so you can scare every one huh?
PRINCE
No…Sorry, I uh
ANGELA
(Laughing) Don’t worry about it Darius- I know you were out hunting.
Angela turns to smile at him over her shoulder. However the Prince looks back at her as if trying to figure her out. Angela stands to face him…
ANGELA
Uh, oh. I was hoping to tell you first but you heard from the knights I suppose… I’m sorry I did not tell you sooner; I just…
PRINCE
Angela, I’m not mad at you… What you did as the White Lady means more to me than you know. You are a better friend than anyone could ask for.
ANGELA
(Sadly) I still should have told you….
The Prince steps towards her and takes her hand in one hand and places his other hand on her shoulder.
PRINCE
You went out and risked your life to rescue me. (pause)
I don’t know what I would have done had anything happened to you! I could never thank you enough. Would you please come to the party tonight- My Father insists on throwing me a birthday party…
ANGELA
(Horsley) sure…
The prince releases her and turns to go… then on second thought he turns back around for a moment smiling.
PRINCE
Oh, and come as yourself-
INT. GREAT HALL
Angela stands tentatively along the wall of the Great Hall. Many couples can be seen dancing in the center of the room, others mill around talking to friends. The Prince makes his way through the crowds of people and finally spots Angela.
PRINCE
(Shyly) I thought you weren’t going to come.
ANGELA
Well I did make a promise to a good friend.
The Prince takes her out to the center of the floor and after a few dances he walks her back out to the edge of the room.
PRINCE
Are you glad you came?
ANGELA
(Laughing) I’m with you aren’t I?
PRINCE
Good… then I would like to ask you how you would feel if I were to ask you to marry me.
Angela’s smile fades and she looks away worried.
PRINCE
What is wrong?
ANGELA
I care for you, really I do, but I am not sure who I care for more.
PRINCE
There is another?
ANGELA
The Black Knight.
PRINCE
I had a feeling you might say that.
ANGELA
Darius it is not like that at all, I don’t know why, I just...
Angela falters as she watches the Prince take a black mask from inside his sleeve and holds it up to his face.
ANGELA
You! You were the Black Knight all along!
PRINCE
I’m sorry I deceived you, I just felt myself falling for you… I had to be certain that you cared for me not only because I am the prince but that you cared for me regardless of my crown. The Black Knight alter ego enabled me to do that.
ANGELA
So you knew all along that I was the White Knight.
PRINCE
That is why I stayed by your bedside when you were injured- didn’t I tell you that you scared us?
ANGELA
When did you realize it was me as the White Knight?
The Prince laughed.
PRINCE
When I saw you raise your sword for battle on the field- I knew it was you then…
Hit by emotion Angela throws her arms around him to hug him. The Prince looks down at her.
PRINCE
Does this mean you will marry me?
ANGELA
Yes!
Ecstatic, the prince leans down to kiss her. Nearby, The King, who was standing behind a group of people, Laughs boisterously (having heard the whole exchange) and slaps his son on the back in approval.
KING
How about a demonstration from the Prince and his bride to be!
Angela blushes but the prince offers her his hand. They both walk out to the middle of the floor and face off; they treat the crowd to a fantastic display of swordsmanship in a one on one duel. Then for the first time in ages the prince gets the best of her and after holding her at sword point for a second and hearing his father clap in approval the prince pulls her close to him and kisses her once again.
THE END

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Character Descriptions for "Defender's of Medesteroc Series"

Image by“Jonathan Zander (Digon3)"
 Found on WikiCommons

Character Descriptions



Main Character/ Sibree Yin: Home: Tianjin, China

Birthday: May 14
Age 10

Painter, very shy girl with short black hair.

Gift: What she paints comes to life, one painting will be a doorway to earth (in last book)

Queen Droleene: long white hair. woven circlet of twigs on her head. She wears a long green skirt made of hundreds of tiny leaves. A white cloth is draped over her shoulders, crossed in the front to cover her chest and then wraped around her waist.

Mage Flouden: merfolk's residing mage. Wears a dark green tunic belted at his waist by a braided rope. Greay pants and bare feet. A chain of delicate moss is sewn around his shoulders. He on a white ribbon he wore a dark red pendant that had splotches of yellow orange and brown in it. The pendant is in a shape sibree can't recognize (only mages can) He is an elderly man, short and heavy with straggley thin white hair , bushy white eyebrows and a mustash that dropped down past his chin on both sides.

Central Question Exercise (college work)

Image by: Chrisdelachal Found in WikiCommons

Central Question Exercise- College Assignment


(This is based off of a book that I have in progress... Temporarily titled "Secrets of the Tomb"... look for more posts on this book coming soon!!!)

Central Question: Can a group led by the once high priest, Anuk Sabe', help Tut change his fate?
Obstacles:
1. A spy is within the group trying to help Tut, this spy loves to outwit the groups attempts to keep Tut safe.
2. The group is seen as outcasts in Egypt and are hunted (by the ones that want to overthrow/ kill Tut.
3. The secret group now suspects two of the people that are the closest to Tut for the many attempted murders. (Aye, Tut's grand vizier (or personal counselor); and Horemheb, the Commander in Chief of Egypt's armies and supposed protector of Tut)
Creative ending:
Aye decides to send a slave into Pharaoh Tutankhamun's room in the middle of the night to pour poison down his throat while Tut sleeps.
Tut tosses and turns in his bed as he tries to sleep after a bad nightmare. Even the items that decorate his room cast disturbing shadows on the floor and walls. A few feet from his bed a tall and heavy flower pot stands filled by lilies from the nearby Nile. Though they were placed there by his wife, the shadow that it places on the floor reminds him of the field where an unknown man tried to smother him while Tut inspected the year's crop. The moon filters through the curtains hanging in the windows to his room; it shines a reflection on the opposite wall that reminds him of the spot on the Nile shore where someone had attempted to drown him. A wooden chime hangs over his bed; as it twirls the clop, clop sound reminds Tut of the race where his horses got spooked and nearly trampled him. As Tut shuts his eyes tight and shakes his head to get rid of the disturbing images he wishes for a way to escape the never ending death threats… however another sound has suddenly catches his attention.
As the slave nears Tut's bedroom door he stumbles on an ornate floor rug outside the door. The slave clatters into the pot sitting on the nearest pedestal. No guards made a sound to silence the slave or warn him of the penalties of waking the Pharaoh. As a matter of fact it did not sound as if there were any guards posted by his door tonight. Surprised, and knowing that he did not request assistance from any of the servants, Tut decides to lie still and wait for the servant to enter.
The servant enters cautiously; carrying a plain wooden bowl as if it holds his own life. Knowing that the servant would, under normal circumstances, give the required announcement of his presence before approaching the Pharaoh, Tut is now a little worried. The Pharaoh partially closes his eyes and peeks at the approaching servant through his thick black eyelashes. As the servant reaches the bed he reaches out for Tut's mouth to prepare to pour in the contents of the bowl. The smell coming from the liquid immediately tells Tut that the contents of the bowl are poison.
Feeling adrenaline pumping through him, he realizes he once again is facing the possibility of his own death. With his left hand balled into a fist he strikes the servant hard in his ear causing the servant to lose his balance. Frowning in concentration and anger, he throws the thin sheet off of his body. Tut quickly rolls out of his bed and flings himself on the servant. As they roll around on the floor, each struggling to gain control of the other, Tut's one free hand finds the servant's mouth and holds it closed so he can not cry for help.
Tut knows that the servant is only a few years older than himself and much stronger so he will have to act fast if he is to overcome the attacker. As they roll near the ornate vase holding the potted lilies, Tut suddenly reaches out and pulls it down onto the servant's head. The heavy vase bounces off with a loud thud and rolls away to reveal the servant's head. Because the servant had turned his face away from the blow there was no blood; only dazed the servant groggily turns to face the Pharaoh once more.
Knowing he has little time Tut quickly decides on his plan and grabs the head of the servant in both of his hands. Shaking slightly, the Pharaoh smacks the servant's head hard on the floor with a sickening crack. As blood pools on the floor Tut knows that the young servant is headed toward the afterlife… And with no time to spare Tut undresses and puts his own clothes on the servant.
Throwing the servant's garb on himself Tut grabs the now empty bowl and tries to sneak down the hall to escape the palace, however just around the corner Tut finds Aye standing in wait for him.
"Is the deed done?"
"Yes, Grand Vizier, the young pharaoh lies dead on the floor of his chamber." Tut lied without meeting the Vizier's gaze.
"Good, go and inform the funerary service that the young pharaoh is ready to be prepared for the afterlife."
Tut nods in obedience and walks off to the safety of a normal life.


"Secrets of the Tomb" Character Descriptions

Public Domain on Wikicommons

Character Description: Tut
(Fictional Story of King Tut)
Short Name: Tut

adopted name: Tutankhamun (living image of amun)
Born Name or Nomens: Tutankhaten (Living image of aten)
Throne Name or prenomens: Nebkheperure (Lord of manifestations is Re)
Epithet: Heqaiunushema (ruler of Heliopolis)

{use adopted and prenomen when announcing later}
[Aten is the disk of the sun
Re is the sun god
Amun is the the father of the gods, god of what cannot be seen, and ruler of wind and air.]

Physical Description: Black hair, Dark Tan colored skin, short and slender


Born at 1343 bc He started his rule at age 9 and ruled from 1334-1325.

His parents (heretics) Abolished all the other gods and forbade their worship. They ruled that everyone should only worship the sun disk aten. coreagent Smenkhare ruled for three years with his father until father died and priests asked smen if he would switch and upon a no they killed him. Tut was 6 when his father started working with the coreagent and 9 when he was crowned.Tut did not agree with this worship. Marries Ankhamun a year after crowned. They abandon el-Amarna and return to Thebes after three (age 12) more years rule. During the next three years tut asks the temples of the old gods to be rebuilt and he changes his name. The whole time he is striving to overcome the coreagent (aye) who wants the thrown for himself

Character Guidelines: [Name: King Tut]
{Nomens}Born Name: Tutankhaten (Living image of Aten)
Adopted name: Tutankhamun (Living image of Amun)
Epithet: Heqaiunushema (Ruler of Heliopolis)
{Prenomens}Throne Name: Nebkheperure (Lord of Manifestations is Re)
Born: 1342 BC Ruled: 1334 BC Died: 1325 BC
Wife: Ankhesenpaaten- Ankhesenamun
Children: 2 (still born girls) Buried: Valley of the Kings
Short Description: Black hair, dark skin, short, slender. Tut was 6 yrs old when his father Akhenaten dies. Tut's older brother Smenkhare becomes pharaoh after officiating his fathers ceremony. The Priests approach him at some point about changing back to many religions. When Smenkhare declines he disappears. (poison or voluntary leave?) 3yrs.
Tut is named successor and officiates Smenkhare's ceremony. Tut was 8 when he became king. Tut marries Ankhesenpaaten a year later. Tut is approached, moves, and changes name each within a year of each other He restores the temples from 1344-1341. Ruled for 9 yrs.
What is his purpose in the story? Tut is the protagonist in the story… Trying to find out why he has such an early death.
What Traits can I attach to him?
How can I make each trait more unique or memorable?
How am I avoiding cliché?
How can a minor character irritate him?
How can he help him in a unique way?
What plot possibilities- a twist, revolution, a setup, a premonition, a mood shift- does the character have to offer? Twist: Tut really was not dead… there is a dummy in the tomb and Tut went elsewhere. Perhaps he had something to do with Smenkhare's disappearance. Buried in Aye's Temple? Arrow in leg, crack in back of Skull. (This mummy is the scapegoat. A servant that looks similar to him and tut finds him trying to poison him an shoots him in the leg to stop him running and hits him on the back of the head with a pot)







Character Description : Ankhesenamun (Tut’s Wife)

(In progress... )

Short Name: Ankhamun

Born name: Ankhesenpaaten
Adopted Name: Ankhesenamun

After she married Tut the two became unseperateable. They went hunting together and played senet and jakel and hounds. Tut warnes her aye is planning on killing him so he has to escape. She tells him she will cover for him and make sure the (servant) is buried instead. she becomes afraid for her life and asks the hittite king Suppiluliumas to send one of his many sons to her aid to marry. after writing back to make sure this is real the king sends his youngest son Zannanza. Zann is killed at the egyptian boarder. the 70 days moarning are up and she is out of time... she reluctantly agrees to marry aye and then escapes soon after to go find tut.

Minor Character Guidelines: [Name: Ankhesenpaaten]
{Nomens}Born Name: Ankhesenpaaten (she who lives through the Aten
Adopted name: Ankhesenamun (she who lives through Amun)
Born: 1346 Died: 1324
Husband: Her father Akhenaten, her brother Smenkhkare and then her brother Tut, and Aye all to legitimize their claim to the thrown
Children: 2 stillborn girls
Buried: ?????
Short Description:
What is her purpose in the story?
What traits can I attach to her?
How can I make each trait more unique or memorable?
How am I avoiding cliché?
How can the minor character irritate the protagonist?
How can she help him in a unique way? She knows about Aye's plan to keep him from being king so marries him so he can be, or tut marries her so she won't have to marry Aye.
What plot possibilities- a twist, revolution, a setup, a premonition, a mood shift- does the character have to offer? Asked Hittite King Shuppiluliuma to send his son Zannanza to marry her so she will not have to marry Aye. When Tut kills his intended killer he calls her into his room to explain how he knew and where he is going… said it would look suspicious if she left and did not stay to mourn his supposed body so she stays behind. Rejoins him later? She is 21 when tut "dies" He is 17.



Minor Character Guidelines: [Name: Amenhotep IV]
{Nomens}Born Name: Amenhoteb (Amun is pleased)
Adopted name: Akhenaten (Servent of the Aten)
Epithet: ?????
{Prenomens}Throne Name: Neferkheperure (Beautiful are the manifestations of Re)
Born:???? Ruled:1353 Died: 1331
Wives: Nefertiti, Merytaten,Kia,Mekytated, Ankhesenpaaten
Children: Merytaten, Mekytaten, Ankhesenpaaten-tesherit, Merytaten-tasherit and two others??? Buried: Akhetaten (el-Amarna), later moved (?) to Valley of the Kings
Short Description: Tut's father.
What is his purpose in the story? Made Aten (sun) the sole god of Egypt. Art Became more about everyday things instead of traditional workings. Statues were made more lifelike and exaggerated at times. All old temples destroyed and he built a new town called Akhenaten (el-Amarna).
What Traits can I attach to him? Radicalist… won't listen to reason, thinks everything he says is true no matter what everyone else thinks. Over bearing and dominant.
How can I make each trait more unique or memorable? Stretch his reactions to the extreme.
How am I avoiding cliché?
How can the minor character irritate the protagonist? Not let him learn the ways of the pharaohs, co reagent Aye tells him about a priests premonition about Tut's kingship and Akhenaten tries to inhibit him from becoming so.
How can he help him in a unique way? Giving him this free time to help the priests set their plan into motion.
What plot possibilities- a twist, revolution, a setup, a premonition, a mood shift- does the character have to offer? Akhenaten is very moody and will snap at the drop of a hat… probably dies of a heart attack. Has his Co Reagent Smenkhkare take the thrown instead of Tut when he already knows the prophecy.
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Minor Character Guidelines: [Name: Aye]
{Nomens}Born Name: Aye
Adopted name: none
Epithet: It-Nejer ("Father of the God")
{Prenomens}Throne Name: Kheperkheperure ("Everlasting are the Manifestations of Re")
Born:???? Ruled: 1325 BC Died: 1321 B.C.
Wives: Tiy II, Ankhesenamun
Children: ??
Buried: Tomb KV 23, Valley of the Kings
Short Description: Father of Akhenaten's chief wife Nefertiti and Vizier to Tut
What is his purpose in the story? To keep Tut in line.
What traits can I attach to him? Stuffy, knowitall, shifty
How can I make each trait more unique or memorable?
How am I avoiding cliché?
How can the minor character irritate the protagonist? Constantly going over his head, and holding over his head the fact that he has been vizier longer than he has ruled
How can he help him in a unique way? In the beginning help Tut get acclimated to being pharaoh
What plot possibilities- a twist, revolution, a setup, a premonition, a mood shift- does the character have to offer? Has a hand in trying to Kill Tut… warns Akhenaten that the priests have had a premonition. Then forces Tut's wife to marry him, to outmaneuver Horemheb the Commander of the Egyptian army who had been designated as the idnw or the Deputy of the Lord of the Two Lands by Tut. Horemheb was presumed to be the heir and successor should Tut die but Aye got to it first by forcing Tut's wife to marry him. After Tut's wife finished talking w/ Tut and he 'left' Aye approached her about marrying him, she said no and then wrote away to the Hittite king, Aye then blackmailed her into marrying him
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Minor Character Guidelines: [Name: Smenkhkare]
{Nomens}Born Name: Smenkhkare (Vigorous is the soul of Re)
Epithet: Djeserkheperu (Holy of Manifestations)
{Prenomens}Throne Name: Ankhkheperure (Living are the Manifestations of Re
Born: ????? Ruled: 1331 Died: 1334
Wives:
Children:
Buried:
Short Description: 3 years as coregent under Akhenaten (his brother) ruled as pharaoh from 13
What is his purpose in the story? Akhenaten did not want tut to become pharaoh so he found a way to get Smenkhkare (his brother) to be coregent with him and therefore take his place when he died
What traits can I attach to him? Layed back…Does not want to be pharoah
How can I make each trait more unique or memorable?
How am I avoiding cliché?
How can the minor character irritate the protagonist?
How can he help him in a unique way? Give tut the idea of leaving if he finds out people are trying to kill him.
What plot possibilities- a twist, revolution, a setup, a premonition, a mood shift- does the character have to offer? Tut will follow his example and leave his thrown when his life is threatened, to go live with his wife in peace.

Secrets of the Tomb

Secrets  Of The Tomb
 (Opening Attempt- will probably change)


Public Domain Image from WikiCommons
Prologue:
Our story begins on a hot afternoon in the Egyptian sand. Far across the Nile River is modern day Thebes, bustling with activity. The Valley of the Kings is also full of excitement for right in front of the tomb of Ramesses VI Archeologist Howard Carter and his team believes they have found the tomb of Tutankhamun Heqaiunushema Nebkheperure (which means Living image of Amun, ruler of heliopolis, lord of manifestations is Re). In other words, they believe they have found the tomb of King Tut!
As they dug the limestone chippings out of the downward sloping corridor, Carter realized that the tomb's layout was not like the layout of all the other pharaohs' tombs in the Valley of the Kings. Was this really Tutankhamun's tomb after all?
After about 30 ft of digging, they came upon a second stone sealed doorway. Cautiously Carter broke a small hole in the second doorway and pushed a rod through. Feeling nothing on the other side Carter made the hole bigger and peered in with a candle.
Lord Carnarvon, the sponsor of the dig anxiously waited behind Carter. Carter's face lit up with excitement at what he saw. He hurriedly dug out more of the entrance and Carter and his three acquaintances stepped inside the small room examining all of the glittering treasures piled inside. Mysteriously though, the walls here were blank with no hieroglyphic descriptions or paintings.
Realizing that the coffin was not in this small room and that this particular room must only be an antechamber, he then turned his attention toward the strange sealed door to his left. Two life-size statues of Tutankhamun guarded the sealed door as if to ward off intruders. As Carter slowly broke through the sealed doorway, he was faced with what looked like a solid wall of gold.
As he climbed inside the room, he found that this was the Pharaoh's burial chamber. This room was mysteriously the only one covered in hieroglyphics. The traditional paintings on the wall were apparently done in a hurry as random splashes of paint marred the wall. Carter found it odd that no one had ever cleaned it up. The large wall of gold was actually one of four shrines one inside the other which housed the carved, stone sarcophagus of Tutankhamun.
They found just two more rooms in the strange tomb both packed with treasures. However neither rooms were painted, which left the small tomb with an unfinished appearance… They also found evidence that Tutankhamen had died young and without warning. To this day, no one really knows how or why…
On a hot afternoon in the Egyptian sand, far across the Nile River is modern day Thebes, bustling with activity. The Valley of the Kings is also full of excitement for right in front of the tomb of Ramesses VI Archeologist Howard Carter and his team believes they have found the tomb of Tutankhamun Heqaiunushema Nebkheperure (which means Living image of Amun, ruler of heliopolis, lord of manifestations is Re). In other words, they believe they have found the tomb of King Tut!
As they dug the limestone chippings out of the downward sloping corridor, Carter realized that the tomb's layout was not like the layout of all the other pharaohs' tombs in the Valley of the Kings. Was this really Tutankhamun's tomb after all?
After about 30 ft of digging, they came upon a second stone sealed doorway. Cautiously Carter broke a small hole in the second doorway and pushed a rod through. Feeling nothing on the other side Carter made the hole bigger and peered in with a candle. Lord Carnarvon, the sponsor of the dig anxiously waited behind Carter. Carter's face lit up with excitement at what he saw. He hurriedly dug out more of the entrance and Carter and his three acquaintances stepped inside the small room examining all of the glittering treasures piled inside. Mysteriously though, the walls here were blank with no hieroglyphic descriptions or paintings.
Realizing that the coffin was not in this small room and that this particular room must only be an antechamber, he then turned his attention toward the strange sealed door to his left. Two life-size statues of Tutankhamun guarded the sealed door as if to ward off intruders. As Carter slowly broke through the sealed doorway, he was faced with what looked like a solid wall of gold.
As he climbed inside the room, he found that this was the Pharaoh's burial chamber. This room was mysteriously the only one covered in hieroglyphics. The traditional paintings on the wall were apparently done in a hurry as random splashes of paint marred the wall. Carter found it odd that no one had ever cleaned it up. The large wall of gold was actually one of four shrines one inside the other which housed the carved, stone sarcophagus of Tutankhamun.
They found just two more rooms in the strange tomb both packed with treasures. However neither rooms were painted, which left the small tomb with an unfinished appearance. Three years later, experts would find out that the reason for this. They found evidence that Tutankhamen had died young and without warning. To this day, no one really knows how or why… Or is this realy tutankhamen's real tomb? What really happened to the boy king? And why did his widowed wife only 22 at the time mysteriously disapear only three years after her husbands death? Her tomb has never been discovered...

Defenders of Medesteroc Series/ Book 1: Story of Sibree


Title subject to change: Defenders of Madesteroc Series / Book 1: Story of Sibree Yin



Written by: Author Virginia Lori Jennings

First Draft Attempt (Has already changed a bit)


Image by Didier Descouens
  Found on Wikicommons

Story:

Sibree Yin slept restlessly in her room in her parents' small apartment in Tianjin, China. A voice, that haunted Sibree Yin every night for a year now, once again found its way into her sleeping mind. The voice was deep and sang slowly, a sadness resonating in it's song...

A disaster on Medesteroc
Has affected every tree and rock
The stone that fell shows no remorse
The cloud gnome mourns the change in course
In sad gray attire he is clad
His once gay dance is slow and sad
A disaster on our once fine planet
Has taken away all our enchantment
They now wane from lack of what they should
Mermaids were sent away from the myrrh wood
Sad now their paintings no longer bright
Loss of magic has ruined their sight
Medesteroc is now afflicted
With a poison not well detected
Worry we do for our sons and daughters
Fairies even flee into deep waters
The loss of magic will be our end
This is the message I now send
The prophesy says I must send
A message to every young friend
And to those young ones who chose to hear
Will be brought to find what we hold dear
Please come to reveal the way inside
And release our magic 'cause we've tried

Then all at once as the song ended, images both of horrible and of magnificent scenes flooded Sibree Yin's mind. Her alarm clock went off and Sibree was jolted awake.
She was worried about being late for school but that did not stop her; she was more worried about losing the images still vivid in her mind. Why she kept having these dreams, she did not know. Her solution was to paint the scenes as soon as she could... she was sure they meant something...
A canvas divided into four paintings was left drying in her room as she ran to the bathroom to get ready for school with only a few minutes to spare. After she finished getting ready for school, she headed down the stairs. Her mother confronted her as she reached the bottom.
"What took you so long getting ready?" Sibree's mother asked.
"Just finishing up the painting of my dream from last night," Sibree said.
"Really, a dream… May I take a look?" her mother said.
Sibree nervously twirled a strand of her short black hair.
"No… I'm not ready for anyone else to see it yet…" Sibree said.
"Dear, it is just a painting… I'm not going to laugh at you for it."
"I've got to go mom,"
Ignoring her mother's protests Sibree hastily pulled her book bag unto her shoulders after she picked it up from the foot of the stairs. She ran to the front door and yanking the apartment door open she ran down the hallway and four flights of stairs to dash out into the sidewalk. Taking just a moment to catch her breath, she ran the last few blocks down the street to her school.
She could not be late… the art show is today! This year's theme is 'Painting Your Dreams'. Sibree thought she might just win… she'd been painting her strange dreams ever since they started!
**********
Sibree's mom wandered around the house collecting the dirty laundry to be washed. After she had checked all the rooms she realized that she did not have any of Sibree's school jumpers in the wash. Making a mental note to reprimand her daughter she walked up the stairs to her daughter's room. Opening the door she immediately saw what she was looking for… a pile of dirty laundry on the floor at the foot of Sibree's bed.
Picking up the pile and turning to leave the room Sibree's mom saw that her daughter's closet door was wide open. She stepped forward to shut it and gasped as she saw what was behind the door.
Beside the only window in Sibree's room stood an art easel. A marvelous painting adorned the canvas hanging on the easel. Sibree's mom turned to take a closer look at the painting… It showed a magnificent forest with many interconnected tree houses hanging amongst the trees, a great underwater castle, lifelike creatures dancing on the clouds that hung in the sky and a great crystal cave.
Sibree's mother carried the laundry with her as she backed out of the room in shock…
"My daughter dreamed this…"

**********

Sibree rolled over in her bed and tried to remember the cause of the bad headache she had… and then she remembered she had fallen asleep crying…
She was at the art show… and the judges would soon be coming around the gym to take a look at the art displays from her grade level. To calm her nerves Sibree began to rearrange the smaller canvases in her display. Each small canvas depicted a fantastical creature on a plain white background, each creature in a different pose. They were the creatures she had been dreaming about… the creatures from the land she had painted in the biggest and most prominently displayed canvas on her table.
It was then Sibree noticed that her main piece of art was missing! Sibree walked around the gym between all the other art exhibits hoping to find it. It was not until she had looked over almost the whole gym when she did find it.
Handing in the center of an exhibit belonging to one of the higher grade students was her painting! It had already been judged, she saw. It had been given a red ribbon, but the student that was given the credit for her painting was not her!
"That's my painting you have there!" Sibree yelled, drawing the attention of some of the nearby judges.
"This painting is not yours! You could not possibly paint like this! It's mine… you'd have to get help from Leonardo Da Vinci to paint this well!" The older boy said, and then joined in with the laughter from his friends who had heard his comments.

"Leonardo was a great painter, but he's dead now." Sibree answered.
Then it was as if she suddenly realized what the boy was trying to say…
"Precisely, so it would have to be a miracle for you to paint this!" The older boy said amid the laughter from his friends as Sibree's eyes filled with tears.
"Young man, is this painting yours or hers?" A nearby judge asked.
"It's mine! But since there is going to be so much dispute about it I will take it out of the contest." The boy said as he took the canvas off of his display.
No one had time to stop him as he brought the canvas down over his knee and smashed a huge hole right in the center.
Tears ran down Sibree's face as she ran from the gym. She hid in the bathroom for half an hour before making her mind up to return to her own display. She hoped that perhaps one of her smaller pieces received a ribbon at least. When she got there she found her friend from class, Marriel, waiting for her.
"I'm sorry Sibree," She said, "They have disqualified you…"
"What?" Sibree asked as a frown creased her forehead.
"They said they disqualified you for trying to cause trouble with the other boy by claiming his artwork was yours." Marriel said sadly.
"But it is mine!" Sibree exclaimed.
"Still telling stories huh? How could anyone possibly believe that you could possibly create something as good as that?" The older boy said with a sneer on his face as he walked up.
"Go back to painting your little fairies and leave the real paintings to be done by people who know how to paint!" He added as he pointed to her smaller canvases
The students in the nearby exhibits laughed…

**********

Sibree sat up in bed and wiped the tears from her eyes. She also rubbed her forehead trying to get rid of the headache she had given herself by falling asleep crying.
'Why was I so foolish… why did I believe that I could finally show them all what I could really do? Why…'
Blinking her eyes to adjust to the light, Sibree realized she was not at home anymore. Hastily she tried to remember…
It had been raining, she fell asleep crying as she sat in a chair by the window in her room. She had been watching the rain as she fell asleep. How, then did she get here… Where ever here is?
Sibree slowly looked around her for some small clue as to where she was. Her bed was suspended on both ends by shaped tree branches that went through the floor. A woven carpet with jumbled designs that made no sense lay on the floor. Looking up she saw gigantic leaves above the room.
Her eyes flowed from the ceiling and down the wall across from her bed. The wall was made of wooden slats just like the floor. However there was one difference… down the walls ran vertical lines of writing in a strange and shaky lettering.
"It was written there to inspire hope," A lady said, startling Sibree who had not heard her come into the room.
The lady stood in the doorway blocking some of the light into the room. Her long white hair flowed behind her and caressed the smoothness of her fair cheeks and forehead. A woven circlet of twigs adorned her head. She wore a long green skirt made of hundreds of small leaves. A white cloth was draped over her shoulders, crossed in front to cover her chest and then wrapped around her under her bosom.
"Can you understand it?" The lady asked pointing to the writing.
Sibree shook her head 'no'.
"And do you know why you are here or how you got here?" The lady asked farther.
"I don't even know where here is ma'am," Sibree said.
The Lady did not reply to Sibree's questioning look but instead crossed the room to look at the canvas, before which Sibree had not noticed, that was hanging on the wall above the bed.
"I think it would be best to show this to him as well…" The lady said.
As she proceeded to reach over the bed to take the painting down from the wall, Sibree looked over her shoulder and realized that it was the painting that had been drying in her room.
The lady walked over to the door carrying the painting under one arm, she beckoned Sibree to follow her with her free hand. Sibree followed her out onto the landing outside the room. Sibree gasped as all around her she saw many more 'Tree Houses' sitting among the trees around her.
Intricate banisters adorned the suspended bridges interconnecting the many tree houses. Each little room in the system of tree houses consisted of a floor and walls with windows while a cluster of leafy branches still growing from the tree hung over the roofs. There were also ladders and pulley systems of elevators, it looked like a maze suspended among the trees!
The forest floor was far below them and Sibree grabbed the nearest banister for support as the height surprised her. The lady led her over the bridge in front of them. As they reached the next tree, the lady stopped at the landing and led Sibree down a winding set of stairs running down the tree.
After a maze of other bridged and staircases they finally came to the tree that the lady was looking for. In front of them stood not a tree house but more like a tent on the platform. The sides were tied down to the platform; bunches of dried flowers and assorted crystals hung on the sides of the tent. The lady beckoned for Sibree to head into the tent first and then followed her inside. All around the tent were hundreds of sparkling crystals hanging from silken ribbons. A short figure beckoned from the dark corner for Sibree to sit on a pillow at the center of the tent.
"You may ask all your questions here. This is Flouden one of the mage's of this land." The lady said. "Come see me when you are done."
The mage Flouden came from the corner of the tent and sat cross-legged in front of Sibree. He wore a dark green tunic belted at his waist by a braided rope. Gray pants covered his legs, however his feet were bare. A chain of moss was sewn around his collar. He wore a smoky gray crystal pendant on a silken white ribbon. He was a short, heavy and elderly with straggly thin white hair. He also had bushy eyebrows and a mustache that drooped down past his chin.
"Queen Droleene said that you would most likely want to know how you got here… well the truth is I don't quite know." Mage Flouden said.
"Who is Queen Droleen?" Sibree said.
"Queen Droleen is the leader of the Mermaids. She led you here to me." Mage Flouden said, "and yet, even though I cannot answer how you got here… I sense that you have a greater desire to know what here is."
"Yes sir, but how did you…"
"I am a mage," He said, "But more about me later…This land we are on is called Madesteroc….
"Madesteroc?" Sibree said, "You mean the places I've been painting are real?"
"Painting… What do you mean?" Mage Flouden said as the wrinkles deepened in his forehead.
"Here I'll show you," Sibree said, standing, she made her way back to the opening of the tent where the lady 'Queen Droleen' had set the painting to the side.
Sibree opened the tent flap wider to let in more light & brought the painting over to Mage Flouden. Mage Flouden stood to receive the painting and as he looked at it he became even surer of his decision.
"I painted this before I got here," Sibree said, "The trees in this scene look just like this place."
"Mage Flouden... my dreams... the ones about Madesteroc, they were not always peaceful. My dreams seemed to tell me that something horrible happened here..." Sibree broke off as she noticed the Mage's face become sad.

**********
(to be continued...)